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Sunday, February 09, 2014

Romcons Save Marriages - Chastity Bra Needs Script - Blockbuster Flop To Come

Movies Can Save Your Marriage
Time to watch a few Romcoms !

Apparently, there is some evidence that watching romantic comedies (romcoms) can prevent marriages from failing.  That's right. According to a study conducted at the University of Rochester, NY, couples that viewed 5 or more romcoms per month (OMG) and discussed them afterwards (OMG x 10) reduced their likelihood of divorce.

Who would have thunk it?  Forget about emotional support, shared activities, family, or an understanding of what each partner's desires and aspirations are - all you have to do, to live happy ever after, is watch 5 sappy movies each month.  Well, I can think of a few good romcoms right off the top that would work perfectly: 'The Full Monty', Mr. & Mrs. Smith', 'Kramer vs. Kramer', Tyler Perry's 'Why Did I Get Married', and 'Wall-E'.

Seriously though, Professor Rogge and his associates at the U of R found that watching films and then discussing them with your spouse "drastically reduces the likelihood of divorce".  Oddly, many romcoms end in not so perfect ways so openly discussing these issues is the key to this approach.
Hmmmm........ what about watching action/adventure or fantasy films, what about porn?  Not the same I'm told. Not warm and cuddly enough. But if romance and comedy are all a couple needs to 'make it' and be blissful, I believe, romcom viewing should be government mandated.  Gosh, wouldn't that be a boon to the movie industry!

In summary, if you marriage is currently on the rocks watching a few romcoms with your better-half may solve your problem(s).  Good luck!

A Product That Demands A Script

I rarely post about items or issues that are not related, in some way, to the cinema but this topic has huge potential for a 'movie' in the making - the smart bra.  At long last, a chastity bra that magically unlocks only when the wearer finds true love.  You can't make this stuff up, and yes, I'm sorry to say this bra trumps the smart toupee.

Manufactured by Ravijour, a Japanese lingerie company, the bra stays locked tight against any unwanted intrusions until .... the 'one' comes along, then it swings open - hopefully to no one's injury.
Ravijour's Human Sexuality Specialist told CMG, "When we fall in love, we experience an instant boost in excitement.  That feeling is unlike any other excitement we encounter in life. When excited the adrenal medulla secretes catecholamine, that affects the automatic nerve and stimulates the heart rate."

A sensor built into the bra detects the wearer's heart rate and sends it to a smartphone app via Bluetooth.  The app calculates the "love rate" based on changes in the heart rate over time.  When this rate exceeds a certain value - presto!  According to the company spokesperson, "Until now, the bra was just a piece of clothing, but now it is an instrument to test for true love, and destined to become a friend of women around the world."  Ok, if you say so.  Hopefully the heart rate doesn't mistake road-rage or watching romcoms as detecting true love.

Speaking of romcoms, this bra would make a perfect storyline for a romantic-comedy, think about it.

Superman v. Batman - Is It a Box Office Flop Already?

Sometimes you can see tough-times ahead for movies. An example could be the upcoming planned blockbuster - Superman v. Batman, which seems to be trending toward the proverbial flop-house.  How can we foretell?  Well the big omen comes in the form of the casting of the movie - which has now been moved to a 2016 release vs. the original 2015 date.

First it was announced that Ben Affleck won the role as Batman and that he had signed on for three Batman movies.  Later it was revealed that he would also be Directing the film which is being shot in Detroit.  However. by the time the third sequel is released Ben will be well into his fifties - a bit too old for Bruce Wayne.

Next came the announcement that Gal Gadot, a good but little known actress and fashion model, won the role of Wonder Woman in the film.  Again, Gadot is 'iffy' and perhaps miscast for the bomb-shellish  WW role - she'll have be beef-up to be believable.

Now along comes the announcement last week that Jesse Eisenberg has been selected to play the role of the very sinister Superman nemesis Lex Luther. - now that's a far cry from  'Juno'.  It was rumored that the role was turned down by several actors before offered to Eisenberg, Joaquin Phoenix for one.  But again, as with Affleck and Gadot, Eisenberg just doesn't fit the part and has no background in playing in high-impact, action movies.  In fact, all of the casting selections are far removed from the powerfully physical  comic characters they are to portray.

Come to think of it, the whole idea of  Superman v. Batman is ludicrous.  Superman is indestructible and has no physical weakness (save Kryptonite) while Batman is human with no super powers. The entire premise of the movie is flawed - even for a make believe comic.  Anyway, we'll all have to wait and see the box office judgment.

By the way, what ever happened to Robin, you remember, Batman's crime-fighting sidekick. I guess he got thrown under the casting bus.

Jim Lavorato

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