Popular Posts

Friday, February 21, 2014

The Oscars: Behind The Scenes and Loser's Sway Bags

On February 20th the annual Oscar luncheon took place. This is where all of the award nominees come together for libation and grand photoshoot.

Photo of Oscar Nominees at Luncheon

The lunch is a loose rehearsal for the hopeful winners that will take place on March 2nd.  Hosted at the Beverly Hilton, limos delivered the 'A'  listers who were all about conviviality and congratulations. Back-slapping and cheek-kissing were the preferred gestures - no high-fives here, this is serious business.  But, as we know, behind the smiles and bear-hugs lurked lust and vanity for the precious Prize.

So, let's get real. Statements, like Jonah Hill's, "To work with Martin Scorsese, that's all I wanted in my creative life, that was my dream.  I would paint his house if he asked me to."  were par for the course (as in meal) as the schmoozing was paired with the Chardonnay.  Neil Meron, the producer of this year's televised event, provided the nominees with the obligatory warning against verbose, long-winded diatribes during acceptances.  He asked that their acceptance be "personal, funny, and heartfelt and not from a list written on a scratch pad". The theme of this year's show is 'Movie Heroes' - including those behind the scenes.

Each of the nominees was given a sweatshirt embossed with "Nominee" (my guess is most of these were summarily incinerated directly after the luncheon).  Curious as to what the lunch menu included? Well the nominees feasted on (among other items): Horseradish chive mousse, Konbu paper, Weird strawberries, and Stir-fired vegetables.  But, alas, don't feel to sorry for the Oscar noms for they will be receiving their mega-dollar swag bags (see following post), and all of that free publicity, kudos, and saunter down the red carpet.

Oscar Losers Get $80K Sway
Shoes are included in the Swag


Don't feel too badly for the also-rans during the Oscars presentation this year: for, in addition to all of the fame, fortune, accolades, and career improvement an Oscar nomination brings, the nominee also receives the coveted 'swag bag' - and this year's sway is worth over $80 grand.

This week, Distinctive Assets, the marketing firm that puts the bags together, released a list of the goodies which will be included, and which should provide, be it a smidgeon of, solace to the losers.
This year's bags will include everything from pepper spray to maple syrup, with the biggest gifts being a $15,000 private, customized tour called "Walk Japan', and at $9,000 smackers a "Best of Las Vegas" travel package.

"We want to introduce celebrities to an array of companies with fabulous gifts", says Lash Fary of Distinctive Assets"It will surely brighten their day. Even Hollywood's most acclaimed stars are disappointed over an Oscar loss, and when our consolation gift shows up the next day we like to think it's a welcome distraction."   Those poor bastards, you're breakn' my heart Lash.

This year's, "Everybody Wins" swag bag (which has no affiliation to the Academy Awards) includes this sampling of gifts:

- Chocolatine's Wine Pairing - $80
- Halo Natural Pet Foods - $6,000 donation to animal rescue or shelter of giftee's choice
- Steamist Home Spa System - $2,560
- Rouge Organic Maple Syrup - $250
-Acupuncturist House Call - $500
- 5 nights @ Koloa Resort, Hawaii - $2,000
- 5 nights @ Imanta Resort, Ocean Casa - $3,300
- Rocky Mountaineer Canada Train Package - $4,075
-Epic Pet electrolyte therapy sessions - $1,500

and on and on. It seems like it's a lot better being rich and famous than poor and unknown.

Best
Jim Lavorato

No comments:

Post a Comment