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Tuesday, January 26, 2016

What's Up At The Movies - by Seymour Flix

Woman Shot Watching Movie - Patron Safety Not A High Priority

This past Thursday, a woman was shot at a cinema while watching '13 Hours:The Secret Soldiers of Benghazi'.  The shooting took place at the Regal Stadium 14 in Renton, Washington.  Authorities stated that an intoxicated man was allowed to enter the cinema and while in the auditorium fumbled with a gun which discharged and hit an innocent moviegoer.
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By the time police arrived, the man had fled the scene.  He later called the police and confessed that he had dropped the gun and it discharged, the bullet hitting Michelle Mallari in the shoulder. The man, Dane Gallion, 29 stated he had been drinking before entering the cinema- he has been charged with felony assault. Ms. Mallari, now hospitalized, is expected to fully recover from her wound.

So, again, this brings up the question of cinema patron safety. Obviously Gallion was intoxicated (which was confirmed by witnesses) and should not have been allowed into the cinema by Regal staff.  Cinemas need to be vigilant and patron safety should be a primary concern - in this case it wasn't!

In the wake of other recent cinema shootings Regal added a new security warning message on its website, which states "backpacks and bags of any kind are subject to inspection prior to admission".
Well, by golly, I feel a lot safer now!  Checking backpacks? Who wears a backpack to go see a movie? Are cinema ushers, popcorn makers, and sweepers becoming low-paid security guards?  And, God forbid, what if a box of Dots or Sweet Tarts or bottle of water is found in the sack?

Women moviegoers have reported that their purses were searched but only after their tickets were purchased but before any concession buying.  To add further insult, most men don't carry purses, so the search policy is skewed towards women.

My policy: attend movies at your own risk. Be on the look-out for intoxicated patrons and make a bee-line for the exit at the first indication of any out-of-the-ordinary goings-on. 

Note: A movie entitled, 'Dark Night' just debuted at the Sundance Film Festival.  The film is about the affect the shooting, in Aurora, Colorado, had on the lives of various moviegoers who witnessed the tragedy.  'Dark Night' is segmented into several vignettes that track the after-shock and emotions of various witnesses of the shooting.

'Dark Night' is a risky move for any director, but Tim Sutton supposedly pulled it off - the movie is a mix genre (narrative and documentary).  As of today the film has no release date as it just started making the festival rounds - we'll wait any see if any distributor picks it up.

It's A 'Perfect World'

China's Perfect World Pictures said it was signing a $500 million movie funding deal with Universal Pictures. This new venture follows only a week after Dalian Wanda, a Chinese investment group, announced it was paying $3.5 billion for the Hollywood-based Legendary Entertainment film studio.

Perfect World's deal is a five-year commitment for a 25% share of films released by Universal (which led all U.S. studios in box office gross in 2015).  Excluded from the deal are the 'Fast and Furious' and 'Minions' franchises.

Termed "a strategic partnership", Perfect World has made no public statement regarding its move into the American film industry.  This deal represents the on-going trend of investment into Hollywood entities by major Chinese entertainment firms.  Other investments have included deals with Warner Brothers, Lionsgate, and Fox studios.

Ban Popcorn At Cinemas - This is Crazy Talk
Somebody, anybody - Mike needs help


Popcorn is a staple at movies - period!  A bag of corn is a symbol of all that is right in the world. Now, a one Mike Shotton (a misguided Englishman), is attempting to ban popcorn from cinemas - and other misfits are agreeing.  Mike's on-line petition to ban corn has the signatures of 416 other heathens. Calling the snack, "the loudest food known to man", Mike says people make too much noise when eating popcorn.  Well Mike, I have never been bothered by loud corn-munchers at a cinema.  In fact, I find the opposite to be true - that eating popcorn prevents moviegoers from talking to one another which is ten times more annoying.

Mike hates corn.  His hatred is deep-seated and Freudian.  It's his Mother - she made him eat corn for supper, far too often, and, his Father, loved the stuff.  Mike, believe me when I tell you that popcorn will never, ever be banned at cinemas.  What else cost 10 cents and sells for $7?  Mike, corn is king at cinemas.  Without corn - no cinemas.

My advice Mike, 'watch movies alone, in the silence of your living room and dwell on your childhood with a good therapist'. 

Best, 
Seymour

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